没有你的第四天

im sorry that im not a good enough girlfriend for you. i wasnt there when you need me. i tried really hard to keep us together, i swear. but one day i woke and i couldnt take it anymore. idk how to face you with lesser and lesser conversations. idk how to face the stress from your family. idk how to get by with seeing you less than 4 days a week. i know. youre trying really hard too. im sorry for giving up so fast but im really tired. 

thank you for the memories. they are really beautiful memories. 

idk why terrible things happen to us but i have to believe that something good is going to come out of this. 

i need you more than you think i do. yesterday, i was feeling really awful after puking in school and i really felt like crying and wishing you were there for me. i appreciate the effort that you rushed down from NP just to make sure im fine. i felt better feeling that you are here with me. 

after all, who really cares?

had food poisoning and ended up vomiting in school. thank god my friends stayed and accompany me till i felt better. they bought me tea and sour plums and kept talking to me to make sure im fine. its not just one of them but 8 of them stayed with me. what more can i ask for? and not to mention, the one that made sure im fine through sms-ing. thanks guys. all of you are awesome. :) a couple of them sms-ed me to make sure im fine. really really touched. 

boyf sent me home and i was feeling so damn awful and also because of those uncaring words from my family, i broke down. you dk how bad it is to feel that your friends and boyf care more than your family does. felt like a fucking burden. it doesnt matter anw. you are always biased towards the 2 of them ad being the second child, im always neglected. i have alr gotten used to it. 

this whole week has been a really horrible week. :( hoping that next week would be better. 

i could really use a hug right now. 


you know my name, not my story. you heard what i have done, not what i have been true. i dont fucking live to please you. youre not obliged to like me. i dont give a fuck too. 
(对号入座的人是白痴)

craving for all of these to make me feel better :( but i cant eat because i have to avoid spicy and dairy products for a few days. 

BUT I WANT TO EAT! :(

OKAY BYEBYE.