WTF.

whats up with parents these days? seriously. 

first, my 'dad'. EX DAD I MEAN. he totally suck. big time. 

come on, you dont want pay for my poly education nor my laptop & now, you dont even want to give us that little amount of money for pocket money every month? how fucked up can you get? seriously. just twp sets of formal wear for my sis & i & youre like 'why me again? just gave you $100 each.' my mum is paying for our poly education, daily expenses & all. that hard to even buy that for us? yknow what? go fuck off. with that woman that you gave us up for her. dont come back for us when she leaves you okay. dream on that we will want you back. we shall see about it. cant wait till im 21. i wont have to go out with you ANYMORE. the word 'daddy' has become so unfamiliar to me. has not been saying that word for at least 5 years alr? dont expect me to say it anymore. get it right. i have no father ever since i was 10. im getting along fine with it. & i will continue to be. I HATE YOU. 

next, love's mum. i know i have no right to say anything about her but she is really getting on my nerves. at chalet, she called you 2 times to ask if im there with you. you lied saying that im not there & she even asked you to go home straight away if im there. wtf. i will never be your mother's favourite. idk whats going to happen in future. but right now, i feel so tired. everytime i go out with you, its like walking in a field filled with dynamite everywhere. she will call out of nowhere & thats it. come on, youre turning 17 next week alr. im really sick of it. not worth it breaking up with you because of her. i know but im really tired alr love. idk how long i can hold on. 

whats becoming to this world? someone, save me. im getting even more disappointed each day by what our parents are doing. my mood is really at its very bottom now. i could cry any moment. fuck this shit.

PAIN IN THE ASS.

HELLO :)

sooo, went for sec school chalet at NSRCC again. LOL. 

uhm, it was pretty much more enjoyable than the previous time?  well, at least i enjoyed myself!

we went night cycling from the chalet which is located near east coast park, all the way to changi village! :o far huh? we took about 3 hours for the journey to & fro. & when we got back, my butt & my legs hurt like shittttttttt. but, it was worth it though! hahaha

couple of friends were so nice that they treated us to prata & mac breakfast! awesomeeeeee. :)

cycled back to ECP & went to amk hub with love, to watch hunger games! 

been wanting to watch it & pestering him for it for a long long time! even though we were both pretty drained out from staying up almost the whole night, he still accompanied me to watch it! <3<3 how can i not love him? heehee. 

well well, the movie is nice but, its pretty brutal. >< especially when its about when they had to kill tributes from other districts. it was so sad, gross & anything disgusting. i dont think it should be rated PG13. really. even i was pretty grossed out by it. but still worth a watch! :)

OKAY. BYEBYE. 

YUMMY.

FOOD THAT I WANT TO EAT. 

hi boyf, can i have all these? *puppy eyes* :D i know you are very niceeeee. heehee.

credits : google

16 months.

HEY BABY, HAPPY 16TH MONTHSARY! ;)

we have come a long long way together! & im glad that you have never left me. heehee youre awesome. really. yknow something? after being together for so long, it makes me even more comfirm that youre the only one i want to spend the rest of my life with. :) to the others reading this, you may feel cheesy, mushy or whatever. i dont care. im saying words from the bottom of my heart. & i really mean it. <3<3

i found it really sweet when my grandmother told me about her love story with my grandfather (she told me because i asked, of course) heehee. soooo, they met through a blind date & uhm, it was love at first sight? sweet. <3<3 hmm, if im not wrong they were each other's first love. i always enjoy listening to other people's love story, like my grandparents' or disney's love story. but, what matter to me more is that im creating a love story of my own with you, my love. a story unlike any other. ^^

sure, we fight & i get sad sometimes but this relationship is the best thing in my life besides my family & friends. im hapy because of you & despite our arguments, i'd only be unhappy if we weren't together. <3 someone once told me. 'when a guy cries because of  a relationship, thats when you know he cares. he cries because he lost you over one stupid little thing. not all guys are the same, some are douches & wont give a fuck if he just got dumped. but when a guy cries over you, over your relationship ending, you know hes a keeper. so dont fuck it up even more. take the opportunity to show him that you care too. its not always the guys that fucks up. its the girls also.' this is really true. im sorry if i hurt you baby. i know, i said i wouldnt. :( i really didnt mean it. but i kept to one promise! that we will tell each other anything that happens! im proud of that! heehee.

again, we werent able to go out & celebrate. but, i had a great morning with you! im sure things will turn out better once poly starts! ^^ right? im looking forward to dates starting next month! you have kept me waiting long enough! :)

last but not least, i love you.

sweet.

my heart broke when i saw this picture but only after five seconds, i realize there is ellie's reflection in the second window. :')

BEEN HAVING STOMACH FLU THE WHOLE NIGHT & HAD VERY LITTLE REST :( FUCK MY STOMACH. SINCE THE START OF THE YEAR, IT HAS BEEN GIVING ME PROBLEMS. I HATE YOU STOMACH. >:( 

i will love you for a thousand years.

relationships have stages.

STAGE 1 (1-3 Months): The Honeymoon Stage

Everything seems perfect, both are happy and feeling “in love.” You share moments, dates and just having fun with each other, sharing laughs and giggles. It’s like nothing could stop you. Your feelings are infinite, and for once you’re thinking, “This may work out….” and it seems like nothing could go wrong. You spend hours getting ready before going out with this person.

*If your relationship ended in this stage — Most likely, both rushed into the relationship too quickly. Being together was all too sudden and just for the moment. When one starts noticing the flaws, one gets a choice to move foward, or  back away. Being friends has a high percentage of working out, but nothing to stress over. Both may just need the time to get to know one another better.

STAGE 2 (4-6 months): The Bumpy Road

Things are going okay now. The relationship is calm and settled; both are still mostly happy. Had a couple arguments and disagreements here and there, nothing huge. Start to notice some of each other’s flaws and aspects of their personalities not seen before, but still truly care for one another. 

*If your relationship ended in this stage — You truly cared about this person. You had the energy to fight for this person, yet you feel as if something was lacking, something was missing. It doesn’t feel right, one isn’t happy. When one isn’t happy, one tends to walk away to seek their new happiness. Being friends is still a possibility.

STAGE 3 (7-12 months): The Rocky Mountain

You start to realize who your partner really is. A few more arguments may occur. Problems with jealously, overprotectiveness may arise. Other people may come in the picture. The “in love” moments start to decrease, but you feel as if you’ve “fallen in love.” You tend to have this energy inside to strive and “make it work,” and you feel more comfortable being around this person, feeling more of yourself. 

*If your relationship ends in this stage — You feel as if you’re hurt, depending on the circumstances. You were so sure that that person was “The One.” You were so SURE that he/she was different. But like a cancer, a problem that may have happened, a small issue, grew into something larger that took over what was made between two people. You still miss this person from time to time. You still remember the memories. Being friends may be difficult right away, but over time, you slowly mature up, and learn the reality of it.

STAGE 4 (1 year or more): The Long Road

1, 2, 3, 4, 5 years, huh? This person truly means something to you. You are “in love” with this person. He/she made a difference in your life. No one else knows you more than this person. You guys have been through the good, the bad, and the ugly, and still strive to make it last.

*If your relationship ends in this stage — You feel heartbroken; it’s tough. You can’t sleep, can’t eat, you miss him/her, you try to move on, you try meeting new people, but seems like nothing works. For whatever reason the split occured, it must’ve been something important, or something must have been so wrong that it took over. Being “just friends” is impossible, because if you tried to be friends, you wouldn’t be able to think of them in any other way besides the one you once “loved.”

credits :strawberrytelle.tumblr.com

right now, we are in stage 4! (Y) 

i never thought we could have come this far. afterall, we didnt really knew each other at first. :) but we did. its true that unexpected relationships lasts the longest. <3

i just love how he randomly reminds me of how much he love me & how thankful he is to have me. he never fails to make me happy every single day & does cute things that make me fall in love with him everyday. i hope he will never stop doing all these things. :) 

i love you.

i was thinking.

if i would kill myself tonight, who would remember me tomorrow?

HAPPY GIRL.

HELLO.

soooooo, went to IT fair yesterday & myself a new laptop! YAY. heehee. 

TOSHIBA E300. MY NEW PASSTIME. ^^ 

was playing with it the whole day! totally love it! hahahah.

still rotting at home everyday~~~~~ ._. 

any jobs to intro? 

anyway, im selling customised shoes! any design that you want, i can draw it out! :) its $10-$15, depending on the design! contact me at 97912626! <3

OKAY BYE. 

unable to make up for.

HELLO. 

soooooo, poly is going to start soon! im not really looking forward to it though. ._. siansation. idk whats wrong with me. everyone's looking forward to it, but not me. 

anyway, heading down to IT fair tomorrow with family to get my laptop! :) happy girl. thinking of getting most prolly a toshiba laptop? we shall see about it tomorrow! 

i guess, i havent been able to put it behind me. every little thing reminds me of my late ah gong. so many things that i regret not doing or i regret doing. :( i wish. he could come back to us. i know its impossible. its just too hard for me to handle. i have never told anyone about this. not my family, nor my boyf. i dont want them to worry. i dont think im strong enough to face reality. :( time will heal everything? but how long will it take? :( ah gong, i miss you. this is the 19th day youre gone.

okay, bye.